


Gabriel Remembers

by frumious_bandersnatch



Series: Rememberings [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Gabriel Angst, Gen, M/M, Sexual Exploits, Whump, chuck is a bastard, literally fuck him, this is NOT okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 08:07:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25580080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frumious_bandersnatch/pseuds/frumious_bandersnatch
Summary: Gabriel remembers every crumpled manuscript and failed project. And it hurts.
Relationships: Gabriel/Loki, Gabriel/Lucifer, Gabriel/Several Historical Figures
Series: Rememberings [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1853932
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	Gabriel Remembers

He always remembered after he left. At first it was a persistent sense of deja vu, and then he realized. I’ve done this before. I’ve done this all before.

Gabriel was just glad that each time he got to enjoy his time as a child with fresh eyes. But the rest of his life was wrought with bitterness and anger masked by playfulness and sarcasm.

Because it must have been tens of thousands of times that this happened. Did God even know?

Gabriel assumed he didn’t. He could sleep at night that way. 

But he knew just what to say to get Loki to take him in and help him (he’d died the first few times after scuffles with one or more of the gods), he knew just how to act to please Asmodeus when that time came, if it ever came.

Because his fate wasn’t set in stone. He was just a side character. He’d been skewered by Lucifer in Elysian Fields a few times. Others Asmodeus had drained too much of his grace and he was left gasping and spluttering and trying so hard to hold on as he died a painful death in the worst possible place.

One time a Leviathan found him in hiding after Cassie’s little shit show with purgatory. Out of all the ways he’d died, Gabriel enjoyed being eaten the least.

There was a sex pollen incident with Loki, and then a couple million lives later one with Kali as well.

Sam had killed him, Dean had killed him- hell, Castiel had killed him once! Props to the guy, Gabriel genuinely hadn’t seen it coming.

One time he released Lucifer from the cage early, bypassing the seals. He hadn’t died that time, the world had just ceased to be. He supposed Dad didn’t like the way the story was going.

Mindless sex helped sometimes. He’d fucked Elizabeth the First well over three thousand times. Freddie Mercury thrice. Oh- and Cleopatra, Nefertiti, there was always Kali and Loki… Abraham Lincoln once, that had been fun. Man was built like a tree, not very attractive, but he fucked like a stallion.

Brando was fun in his early years, so was James Dean.

His most _interesting_ conquest had to be Julius III. The fucking pope. Gabriel grinned when he thought back about that one.

One time he’d slept with Sam Winchester, and that had been the most perfect thing in the universe. Of course, in that universe Sam killed himself. Gabriel had wanted to do the same after, but he couldn’t bring himself to. Instead he followed the same path as usual, and died in Asmodeus’ captivity. That had been a sad life.

Once he’d been with Lucifer. He was the older archangel’s first, in that universe. It had started out angry, hateful, but Gabriel had gotten so much needier, drinking in his brother and being so glad he could see him as an adult, or as close as Lucifer was allowed to get. He nearly swayed Lucifer away from the apocalypse that time. He’d been happy. Because he had his brother again, and they were so close, and it was just like they were fledglings again.

Michael killed Lucifer in that life. And Gabriel didn’t forgive him for a million years after.

Gabriel felt old. So very, very old. And he was fed up with it. He didn’t know how many lives he’d had, how many times he’d died. In total Asmodeus must have drained him of enough grace to make ten billion new angels. He was finally done.

He appeared in front of a shabby little house on a shabby fucking road and ripped the door open.

The man sitting at the table with a bottle of scotch and a typewriter startled, eyes wide. “What- are you Gabriel? Why are you-“

“Cut the crap.” Gabriel spat. “Make it stop. Make all of this stop. How many times? Why?”

Chuck froze and his shoulders dropped. He looked like a little kid caught in a lie. “How do you- oh.” He swallowed thickly, throat bobbing as he moved to pour himself another drink. Gabriel slapped the bottle out of his hand.

“You didn’t know?” He demanded. “You didn’t fucking know?” He yelled, grabbing his father by the collar of his shirt and slamming him against the wall. “How could you not know?”

Chuck looked scared for a split second before he grabbed Gabriel’s wrist. “Don’t.” He said warningly.

Gabriel didn’t stand down. “How could you not know?” His voice broke. “Don’t you dare end this now, I need to know. Please. Just make it stop.”

Chuck looked Gabriel over, before swapping their positions. “I can’t.” He brushed his fingers through Gabriel’s hair. “Not for you, messenger. Because you can see. You have better premonition than the rest. And I can’t get rid of that.”

Gabriel jerked his head back and clenched his jaw. “You’re a sadist.”

“Maybe.” Chuck wet his lips. “You know, I don’t know why I’m tolerating this.” He wrapped his fingers around Gabriel’s throat.

“No- don’t, please.” Gabriel choked out, reaching up to grab his wrist. “Please, dad-“

“No, if you want to barge in here and demand I fix this, I will. You just need another go around. Then you’ll know to stay away from me. From this issue.”

“No, no- dad, please, I’m sorry, just make me forget, please, just make me forget!” He cried out as his father’s grip tightened. He choked as he was lifted off the floor and kicked his legs weakly.

“Just this one. The rest stay.” Chuck hummed. Part of him needed someone who remembered. Someone who lived through every failed copy of his universes. And he didn’t care how Gabriel felt. In fact, the pain in his eyes was almost beautiful. He sought after it, wrought it from him with ease. 

Gabriel’s screams echoed throughout the neighborhood. Chuck made sure no one noticed.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> All aboard the angst train! I’m having fun with these. Hope y’all enjoy


End file.
